About Me

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I live in Phoenix AZ, and have been working at the cable company since 1989, (I'll let you do the math...it depresses me too much!). I have a dog and a drum set at home that I play with/on regularly. Oh...and a computer. Duh... I shoot all Canon gear. Currently the 40D. I mainly focus on Glamour/Beauty/Artistic Nude photography, but I also love Event & Street photography!

Thursday, May 19, 2005

What makes 100%?

This was sent to me via email by my good friend Paula And to me it was Laugh Out Loud funny. Yes, even more deserving then the standard "LOL" or, "LMAO" or even the coveted "ROFLMAO!"
This little piece of wisdom deserves it's own entry:

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this:

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K

8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E

1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T

2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G

1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the BullshiT and Ass kissing that will put you over the top.


See what I mean?

Thanks Sis!!

Monday, May 09, 2005

Nueve de Mayo

A few days ago there was a party. Unless you live in a cave, you know that it was Cinco de Mayo. The 5th of May. A Mexican celebration of Victory against Oppressors from long long ago. The parties I have attended have all centered around one theme: Beer. Now, since I don't consume alcohol of any kind, beer has little interest for me. Other than the fact that I attend a lot of Dark Ones Parties, and drinking is the primary reason people go to these parties, I wouldn't spend my time around people who are drinking. They tend to be obnoxious and self-absorbed most of the time. Occasionally I encounter what I can only refer to as a "Happy Drunk" when I am in a bar listening to a band, or hearing Karaoke singers (More reasons that Alcohol is a dangerous drug not to be abused. Vocal Chords can be used as a deadly weapon!!) But, I digress (Eight Tech Levels!!! Uh! Uh!)

A few days ago there was a Cinco de Mayo party at a local Mexican Restaurant that I frequent. They have the celebration every year, but this was the first time I went myself. There was a live band "Mogollon" playing some really good Cover Tunes. There was overpriced, yet tasty food...and there was Beer. Beer was everywhere. Beer even found it's way to me. But not to be consumed. Oh, no. To be Worn. Even my Camera wore some beer.

This was my second go round at the party that night. Earlier I attended with my friend Cherry and really enjoyed myself. I ate some tacos and was really getting into to music. But, I had forgotten my camera (Oh, the Shame!) So when Cherry and I had had our fill of the party, we left and I drove her home. But I still had my wristband on, so I came back with the camera. The intention was to get some good candid shots of the people dancing.

I walked through the crowd looking for victims...er, I mean SUBJECTS, when suddenly I felt liquid being sprayed on me and the camera from behind. At first I thought that someone in the crowd had a squirt gun, and I was either the intended target, or an innocent bystander taking a hit from a poor marksman. Then I noticed the smell. THAT was not Water! It was beer that came gushing out of a bottle someone opened nearby! No one at the table even acknowledged that they had doused me and my camera! Well, since I am a lover, not a fighter, I turned to the people sitting at a table nearby and asked if they had a napkin I could use to wipe the beer off my camera. They didn't. But they let me use the table cloth! Then, when the noticed I had a camera, they asked me to take pictures of them! I remember one guy asking me how much the pics would be. He seemed astonished when I told him they would be free. All I needed was an email address to send the link to when I post the images on Flickr.

So, after I took their pics, the folks at the next table over wanted pics for themselves too! At about that time, the band announced they were done for the night. I started walking through the crowd again hoping for some last minute pics to present themselves to my lens when I heard a voice behind me and a hand on my shoulder. It was Security. He was talking into his earpiece radio saying "...we found the camera guy". My heart skipped a beat. I remember when I was hear earlier seeing other people with cameras. I didn't see any signage prohibiting photography. I didn't know why I was being singled out, but as I said before...I am a lover, not a fighter. And I am especially not a fighter of the Security crew! So, since the party was over anyway, there was no feeling of missing anything. We walked thru the crowd, the Security man in front, glancing back to make sure I was still following. I stopped for a moment thinking someone wanted to talk to me about something, but no one even seemed to pay me any attention, so out the gate I went.

I got about 30 feet from the exit when they called to me again. I was thinking, "this is going to be interesting if they smell the beer and assume I am drunk..." Two or three more men approached me and asked why I was taking pictures. Specifically was I taking pics for some magazine or something. Well. No. Not with THIS camera. So, I showed them the group pics I just took and they were entirely satisfied that I wasn't doing whatever they THOUGHT I was doing. They wished me a good night and walked away. Strange.

I start walking back through the parking lot to my truck when I see a group of kids (man am I old) sitting at the drive through for Arby's. So I ask: Hey, can I take your picture? Well, one girl is just jazzed at the thought and her boyfriend seems skeptical. Understandable. But he agrees and so we snap a few quick shots and he gives me his email address so I can send the link to him and off I go.

The only thing that would have made the night weirder is if I had been pulled over and the cop smell the beer on my thinking I am drunk would ask me to do a field sobriety test. That would have been kinda fun really. if it weren't for the fact that the cop could still arrest me if he wanted...So I am glad that didn't happen!

So, this has been the story of how I spent Cinco de Mayo. It only took four days to write it, aren’t you proud?

And SPEAKING of Star Wasr Pics...

It's time once again to share something with all of you that I found totally by accident. I really don't remember what I was doing, or searching for that lead me here but I am glad to have found the place! I am thinking about buying a T-Shirt. Which one would YOU get??

Don't Call Me Jr.! Posted by Hello

LepreCon 31

This weekend I "attended" LepreCon, and I had a GREAT time there! There were several reasons for this. One of them was that The Dark Ones had a Very Successful Party and those are always fun. Another reason was that I got some really great pics at this convention! The link will take you to my Flickr page where the pics are posted. I think you will get a kick out of some of them...and I hope you post some comments about the images that you like! (Or even the ones you DON'T like!

Ok...I know this is a short post, but it's 1am and I have to work tomorrow so I am going to sleep now!

Good Night Everyone!

Monday, May 02, 2005

It's Official! I am REAL Amateur Photographer!

Yeah...like THAT'S something to jump up and down about! Well, actually, it is!
You see, for many years I have wanted to get involved in photography, but I never really did anything about moving forward in that direction. Well, a few weeks ago I decided to change that. I started posting ads on Craigslist offering free photography sessions to ladies just so I can get the experience. And last night it happened! A lovely girl named Lili took me up on the offer! When I started posting the ad, I had no idea what the actual photo session would be like. Since I am NOT a pro, and don't have "Pro Gear" (Just a nice Digital Camera...but you all should know that by now) I thought that the best way to go about it was to talk to the potential client to learn what she wanted to do and figure it out from there. I never thought the shoot would be taking place in my bedroom or that it would be going on past 2:30am! (Well...now I know better!)

Since my Blogging time is really limited at the moment, I will just say for now that we shot over 500 images and she seemed genuinely pleased with the results. I really hope she posts a positive ad on CL to let other ladies know that this is a good deal! There is more to this story, but I will have to save that for another session.

Oh, in case anyone is wondering, I promised that I wouldn't post her pics anywhere so I can't show you what we did. All I can say is: Wow. (Yeah, I know. I am such a tease!)